***Positive Pregnancy Post!!!!***

Shocking, I know, but I have a positive thought about pregnancy today that I need to write about while I can articulate it.

**warning, this post gets deep, with religious aspects**

I love my prego belly. MY BELLY. I am not talking about my huge thighs, chunky arms and fat face. I love my belly, though. Here is why.

Growing up you always think about having kids one day, and what they will be like, look like, etc. And as an LDS you know that they are there, somewhere, they already exist and you are ever so curious about them. They are out there. One day they will be with you, but for now they float around somewhere waiting for you. As I watched my belly today, moving, jiggling, pulsing, I realized how much I love that he is here, in me. Before pregnancy your children seem so distant, so far away, and now, he is RIGHT HERE. I can feel him, I can tease him, I know when he sleeps, I know when he moves, he is right here. Sure I wonder what he will look like, but for now, I take comfort in being close to him, having him, knowing exactly where he is, and that he is safe. I hope I have been able to convey to you the intensity of this thought, because it hit me today like a ton of bricks. Early in the pregnancy its not so apparent, little flutters aren't human like, you can't feel little feet, theres not much personality, so before 20 weeks it still didn't seem like my child was there, it was just some embryo dividing and multiplying into what would one day be my child. But now, I just can't say it enough, he is here, I can poke him!!! And I do...

The last couple months I have pondered how it works with their spirits. I have always been under the impression and thoughts that a babys spirit does not enter them until they are born. I had a miscarriage a month before this pregnancy, and to be honest it didn't have too much of an impact on me for this reason. Maybe its because by the time I found out I miscarried, I was already pregnant again, but I think its also because I really did used to think that its just body tissue, cells, etc. It wasn't a person yet, no spirit, nothing to cry over. But now, I question that way of thinking. Because if I lost Henry right now, I would be devastated. I would miss him. I have already thought about his life with us, and I would so deeply mourn and his spirit. We wouldn't use that name again. A lot of things are mysteries, and one day will be answered, but for now I remain curious. The church teaches(at least I think they do) that babies who are lost during pregnancy, the mom will raise them one day in the after life. I just can't wrap my head around that, as some moms have multiple miscarriages, are they really going to have that many kids one day? Does that mean I have a child up there waiting for me? Its all so complex and something I don't think anyone can answer with 100% certainty, but something I will always wonder.

I can say with all these thoughts, that I am beginning to realize the importance of this pregnancy, and am starting to look at it in a less selfish way. Throughout this whole pregnancy, when people ask me if I am excited for him to come, I always answer by saying I am excited, but not ready, I am just not ready for him to come, I need more time etc. I felt since the beginning, that I wasn't emotionally, spiritually ready for him to come, I knew it was time to be pregnant, but you know, you've been following, I've been worried about parenting and how I am going to do it, I was so overwhelmed because I didn't feel ready to be a mom, and I didn't know if I ever would. I can say now, in my 32nd week, I feel ready. Who knows how good I will be, I will make mistakes, but I feel like now I understand the gravity of the situation, and I feel prepared with resources to succeed for my child. Yes I am still frustrated about my body and I will still not like it, but one day, when I lose the weight, get to a body I love again, I will look at the imperfections that have come from pregnancy as battle wounds in bringing my child into a home of love.

geeze this is heavy stuff!!!

P.S.

The thing I hate about going private is my blog doesn't update on your scrolls or blogger, but, I have figured out a way around it, sort of. before I publish a post I will make it public, publish the post, then make it private again(no need for an invite everytime), and that post will show up in your blogger news feed. So if you want to know when I post, you need to ''officially" follow me, not just on a scroll. Its easy, just click FOLLOW next to the search box in the top left hand corner.

Need your advice on one or all!

I need baby advice! well, getting ready for baby, baby advice.

Jason and I went out this weekend and got EVERYTHING else we think we need(minus some furniture) and I tried putting it all away tonight, but it just made me so overwhelmed at everything I don't know.

for starters...

We got these bottles. We didn't look at any reviews, we didn't take any polls, we just went to the store, looked at them all, read why the boxes said they were the best, and picked what we thought was the best.

Question 1. We only bought 3. We figured we shouldn't buy a whole stock pile until we know what bottles he likes or we like, good or no? Getting home I realized 3 bottles, is not a lot. I plan on only breastfeeding for 1 month max, and formula feeding occasionally from the beginning anyway, and 3 bottles, I mean we might be constantly washing these 3 bottles over and over and then what if we lose one?! So how many do you think we should start with?

question 2. While I was getting these bottles out of the box, I noticed the top unscrews, but so does the bottom! What in the world is the point of that? Is there something I am supposed to know here?

We got a ton of onsies. I noticed while putting them away according to size, that some sizes weren't running the same. 0-3's looked like 12 m, 12 m looked like new born etc. How do you know which ones will fit your baby without going by size, is the only way to just try it on him and see?

Pacifiers, same deal as the bottles sort of. I know we will want lots of these, so slowly over the many grocery trips to walmart I plan on picking a pack of 2 each time, but then I thought what if he doesn't like them?! We got the soothie kind pictured above, which 90% of people seem to use, so I figured its a good chance Henry will like them, but I don't know. bad idea to stock up?

We got this diaper bag set. I love it, its unisex so we can use it with a girl yada yada, but why in the world do I need a mini diaper bag? Help me out here, at first I thought well for when you leave him with grandma, but then I thought whats its the big bag, that I wouldn't want grandma to have access to also? Then I thought well maybe you keep one in each car, but then I thought about the stuff that you would then have to get two of, and what if he has a favorite blankie etc. So tell me, what do I need a second little diaper bag for? church?

We DID NOT purchase a bumbo. lol. I will if someone can give me 5 solid reasons for it. I just don't see the point, can't you just put him on a blanket on the floor just as easy as squeezing them into a plastic contraption? I know everyone has one, and they are all the rage, but I think this fad too shall pass, no?

Burp clothes. We got a few of these from people, which I appreciate and will use, but do I need more, or do you just end up using a towel or a bib? It seems like there are several baby products that are for the same thing, so do you really need each kind?

Crib set. I will be making it, so it goes with the nursery, my question is what all do I need or want? I am fine using a bumper, I think the pros outweigh the cons and we have a ceiling fan in the nursery. Does he need a pillow of sorts? do you put animals in there? What about a mobile? We don't have one, are they really that useful for baby to fall asleep?

Car seat covers. I plan on making one, or two, I have the front fabric picked out, but tell me the purpose before I pick out the back fabric. Is it so the baby can sleep, and therefore should be dark, or so germs stay away from the baby and warmth, therefore it doesn't matter what the inside color is?

Diapers, we got a ton of diapers from people too. Is this the same thing, you should see what you like before you stock up, or can I just go to costco and stock up? and how long do they stay in the smallest size? not very long right?

I just have this need to be ready as much as I can be. I don't want to get Henry home from the hospital and be in a flurry to get things we need or forgot, ya know? I want to make the first day home as peaceful and family oriented as possible, not about going to the store 30 times. Before you comment, I know I know, the first day home will probably be anything but peaceful, but I want it to be about Henry, not about products.

Marriage and Parenting

Everyone gives you their advice when you are pregnant.

its like you have it written on your face that you want it.

They tell you to get sleep, when to give him solids, what to do when he cries, your body will be unrecognizable yada yada yada.

I take it all with a grain a salt and a grin.

But, my side of the family went camping a while ago, and my cousin told me something that changed the way I thought, and I have thought about it at least once a week since then.

she said,

"Having a baby changes the way you thought your relationship with your man was."

I don't know why that struck me, it just did. Its probably because throughout the pregnancy I haven't worried about the little things like changing diapers, bottle temps, baths etc. I have been concerned with the emotional side of raising a child, and creating a family.

I've heard since my early years, that having a baby does not fix marriage problems, it actually makes them worse. So Jason and I made absolute sure that he and I were on solid ground, and had been for a while, before we decided to start a family. Marriage is hard, it takes work, getting used to, and commitment. I imagine being a parent together is no different. I am grateful that Jason and I waited so long before taking this next step. We can say for sure, going into it, that we are totally in sync, in love, in understanding of each other, and are on the same page. I adore the two years we spent just us, I can not imagine getting pregnant right out of the gate, or when someones marriage is rocky, I can only imagine it would make it that much harder. I am grateful for the advice I received, it has made me more aware of what might change and how to keep things amazing, without this advice I wouldn't have even thought about it, and I think when you are aware of things and can learn before you need to, things are much better.
I know in Utah everyone is just so super excited to get married and have kids, but I will never teach my children that mindset. I, personally, think its ridiculous. People need to be ready, REALLY ready. Not just financially ready, but mentally, emotionally and spiritually ready. There is absolutely nothing wrong with waiting, there is everything right with it.

The REAL truth about pregnancy.

I really should change the name of this blog to Kati's Pregnancy blog. Lets just pretend until April that I have.

and be glad, cause I am sure once Henry gets here I will drop off the face of the earth for a month or so.

Lets talk about my current pregnancy frustration.

I am pregnant 24/7.

Sounds Duh right?

but really, I never thought about it before I got pregnant, and wasnt frustrated with it until recently, but seriously. I am ALWAYS pregnant. At first its fine, you've only been pregnant for 5-10 weeks, so you figure you will just power through it. sure. You get to 15 weeks and the REAL symptoms begin. Sure, people tell you about the nausea, peeing, and tiredness, but those aren't the real ones. Not to me anyway. I would much rather deal with those. Lets go through the real ones. and I will tell you the truth, the REAL truth.

Hormones- You wouldn't think this could affect you so much, or at least so harshly. Sure, you've had a period, you know what its like to be moody, but not on this scale. I find myself in the middle of the kitchen tonight bawling my eyes out, because my husband went to go help someone move. what?! Yes. Then after you finish crying, you sit there and wonder how crazy you much be that you were crying in the first place. It plays with your mind.

The waddle- There is no such thing as gracefully walking when you've got the waddle. I thought the waddle comes when your huge, but little did I know it just comes with your joints have loosened, which for me happened early. And to add to it, because you have this human weighing down on your legs, your strides aren't as long. So you take short, waddled steps. If you need to go faster, to keep up with hubby, you gotta waddle faster, looking like a penguin. Graceful.

Sciatic nerve- Not all women suffer from this, but I think a good percent do. If you don't know what a sciatic nerve is, or how it affects you during pregnancy, just google it. I have a friend who's SN(Sciatic Nerve) is really bad during pregnancy, and she used to tell me all about it. The only thing I could think while she was talking was I hope to heavens I don't have issues with it. Thanks to the car accident, I do. I can't do long grocery trips, or mall outings, because if I am on my feet walking for longer than 20 mins, my left leg goes numb, tingles, is freezing, and starts cramping. Then I waddle, and limp. :/

Nipples- Yep. Obviously they go through changes, and you can never imagine what it will be like, even if one describes it to you. So I won't try and describe the change, I will just warn you of the fall out. Whatever is happening to your nipples, the effect the frigid cold has on them is deadly. The first time it got really cold here, and I went outside, I really thought someone was stabbing them with a knife, or rubbing sandpaper on them. Stock up on Lanolin Oil, it has saved my life.

Leg Cramps- Sounds simple. Sounds easy to deal with, just rub it out! No. I wish it were so. I don't know if leg cramps are tied to my SN, but I don't think so since a lot of pregos get them. It would be a whole different story if I got said leg cramps during the day, but when it comes at 3:42 am, and is so shooting painful that it sends you straight out of bed thinking someone has just stabbed your leg, its awful. Its pure torture. The only thing going through your mind is looking at your sleeping husband wanting to smack him in the face with a pillow for peacefully laying there.

The husband- Yes, I said it, the husband. Obviously unless your husband is a jerk, he has done nothing wrong, but its just so frustrating that he has no idea what it is like. What it is like to be pregnant 24/7. You don't get a break, you can't just take off the belly for 15 mins, eat sushi and take a hot bath, and it certainly doesn't just end all symptoms once you go to bed at night. There is no way for him to know what its like, and its certainly not his fault and he is doing everything he can to make it better for you, but emotionally its very taxing that you can't convey or have him experience your pregnant frustrations.

The bathroom visits- Let me just tell you, I won't go into too much detail, but peeing is not the only pregnancy bathroom issue. Number 2 is just as bad, probably worse. If you would like the nitty details about the day I will always remember regarding this, let me know and I will send you a link to where its at, otherwise, just wait. You will see.

Sex- Yes, I am talking about making love, ladies. If you are a lucky one like me, your sex drive goes into total overdrive and you can't get enough of it. Whats wrong with that?! I WILL TELL YOU!!! It, for me at least, is painful after, at this point in my pregnancy. Along with that, your uterus contracts and is rock hard after, sending you into paranoia about how your little one is doing.

Braxton Hicks Contractions- These aren't as bad as everyone made them out to be, but they are very inconvenient. Whenever you, I, have one I have to stop what I am doing and bend over. Its hard to explain what these feel like, but for me I just get this crampy airy uncomfortableness that will only go away after a few minutes of bending over.

So if you are in the store longer that 20 mins and you get one, you are now a bent over, waddling, limping, graceful looking idiot.

:)

But they tell me it will all be worth it in the end.

(On a positive side note, I do love my little bugger. His kicks are becoming more and more enjoyable as I connect to the idea that he is my cute little baby in there. I certainly can not wait to meet him.)

Am I normal?

I am nervous.

to be a mom.

I explained this to my husband on our anniversary, but those feelings still linger.

The details:

Growing up LDS I knew from early on that I was meant to be a mom, I knew I wanted to be a mom. It wasn't until I got married that I realized what being a mom meant. I realized its a job. Not only is it a job, it is the most important job I will ever do in my life. Its a little perplexing that the most important job there is, does not have more training! I feel so unprepared. I know how much I learned, researched, studied and was trained to be able to be a Personal Trainer, and how important is that?! Yet to be a mom, anyone can do it, its encouraged, its popular, yet I feel like I am being thrown into an ocean of other moms who know what they are doing, and are expecting me to keep up the pace. Its so nerve wracking to me. Sometimes I wonder if I take being a parent too seriously, but its not that I am taking it too seriously in a overbearing sort of way, like not letting my kids play outside or things like that, its more the pressure I am putting on myself to perform and be the mom I know I can be, and want to be. Did anyone else feel this way before their first baby, or am I just too hard on myself?

The other obstacle I face, besides myself, is my husband. Obviously that needs explaining. For me, I approach parenthood with the idea of what I want my children and my family to be like in 20 years, and I go back from there. Jason on the other hand takes the approach of we will deal with things as they come up. I think both are suitable ways of handling things, its just hard for my OCD-must-plan-things-out mind to not plan things out more. Of course I know you can't plan everything, things will change, different kids have different needs, but I feel a blue print is necessary.

So I ask you, is this normal?

Well I thought I would give you another pregnancy picture since bedrest seemed to make me pop.

22 weeks:

Last week when I did some spring cleaning in the closets, I came across some books that I had totally forgotten I had, but really liked. So I have started reading them again, and I thought I'd share with you why I like them.

The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work.

I grabbed this book because a blog friend of mine recommended it, and I have loved it. I dislike reading books that are stories, I like the self help books because I would rather get something productive out of reading rather than a story. This book is pretty awesome. I got this book not because we needed marriage help, but because I wanted to know every little thing I could be doing to make our marriage even better. This book talks about the different ways people solve problems, communicate, and it gives you ways to correct bad form. I recommend it for people who need marriage help, but also people who were like me and just wanted to make it that much better.

15 Secrets to Happy Home

OMG, this is by far my all time favorite improve your life book. If you only read one self help type book, please let it be this one. I picked this book up after just browsing around in Deseret Book for an hour and it caught my eye. I really hate the title of this book, because although these secrets do make your home happy, this book is way more about making YOU a happy you. Ever since reading this book I have learned and applied so many principles and ideas that have helped me deal with immature relatives, rude co-workers, negative friends etc. I admit I used to somewhat of an angry person in general, and ever since reading this book I have learned how to naturally be happy every single day. This book truly helps you gain a new sense of contentment and happiness. It helps you cope with situations you can't control, and to really make the best of every situation. I really can't say enough good things about this book. It was written by an LDS author, but its not an LDSie book for those of you who aren't members. Also I love it because its an easy read type book, its the bigger font which is just easier to read lets face it. I even keep this book in my scriptures and on Sundays during Sacrament Meeting when I am bored, lol, I read it. GET IT.

Change It Up

This book is along the same type of book as the previous, its just a bit more personal with the author. She tells a lot of her own examples, but the basis of the book is learning to deal with change, any kind of change. Because change in life is what upsets us, death, losing jobs, divorce, moving, etc. Change is going to happen, so you might as well learn to cope and make the most of it. I like, its not as applicable as the previous book, but it definitely has a lot of good points, thought provoking messages, and points out flaws you might not know you have.

Babywise

I haven't finished this book yet, I just like it so far. lol. I have already done a post on this book, so go here if you want to know my thoughts.

I have actually gotten more into reading now that I am expecting, because I want to get as much knowledge as possible. I have a second cousin, who married an awesome lady, and together they adopted the CUTEST baby girl, their blog is here, and she has just done such an amazing job with Hazel that I wanted to know her secrets. So I asked her what her favorite books were and now I have a new list of books to buy and read! They are:

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child

Secrets of the Baby Whisperer (& for toddlers)

I need to go out and get them, but I want to at least finish Babywise first.

I don't intend on birthing my son, and then just winging it from there. I think that will be disastrous. I think you should learn everything you can, before the baby comes, and have a plan to execute when they arrive. I realize things change, things may not work and you have to tweak things, but its better than just bringing baby home from the hospital and being like"ok now what?" I just refuse to do that. I think thats when the first child becomes the practice child, and I won't do that. I say do it right the first time. Take the time, read, learn, ask around, observe, talk about it, and know how you want to parent from the beginning. I especially think you and your spouse should be on the same page before baby arrives, because once you meet baby, and you fall in love with their personality, your judgement might get clouded and you just wanna do whatever to make baby smile or laugh, which may not be whats best for their long term development. ya know?

want a baby? Get a kitten.

I really think that all soon to be parents should get a Kitten.

Here are my top 10 reasons why.

Top 10 Reasons to get a cat if you want a kid

1. There are sooo many Kittens that need a good home that you really just can't go wrong, unless you are a cruel to animals. :(

2. Cats, Kittens really teach you patience. You don't just get them home and thats that. You have to be patient as they learn where to use the bathroom, not to knock over the Christmas tree, and not to bring crickets inside.

3. They teach you to control your negative emotion. Cats obviously can't talk and express their reasons for doing things, so I feel bad if I get upset at our cats, like I have hurt their feelings and they can't tell me. I never yell at them, I never swat them, and I give them lots of love.

4. They teach you to find more effective ways of disciplining. You can't just yell at a cat and expect they get it, just like I don't believe you should just yell at a child and expect they get it. You have to make sure they make a connection between the action and consequence.

5. They make you aware of others. They are so tiny, and they run all over and sometimes get under your feet, so it teaches you to be aware of who is around, and to be careful.

6. They teach responsibility. If you don't clean their liter, they poop on the carpet and that is your fault. So you have to be diligent in making sure you are taking care of them.

7. They help you understand how to understand the needs of others. When they meow, I can now tell which type of meow it is. They have a needy pet me meow, a whiny feed me meow, and a I really want that fly meow. I can tell when one of them is upset, annoyed, hungry and tired.

8. Most of all they teach you that although they aren't perfect, and they get into things and frustrate you, the love you have for your little one and the joy they bring far outweighs those little things.

9. If the reason you want a baby is because you want to love someone and have someone love you, Kittens are soooo perfect for that. They just snuggle and purr and love you and its so adorable.

10. They are just so cute. :)

Obviously my child has not yet arrived, but I know all these things will come in handy and have prepared me to be able to be the mother I want to be.

:)

So get a cat.

Proceed with caution

beautiful,
crazy,
enlightening,
lucky,
cute,
adorable,
hottie,
amazing,
sexy mama,
healthy,
witty,
gorgeous,
skinny,
healthy,
sassy,
hilarious,
wonderful
and inspiring.

This awesome blog friend of mine(who just had her beautiful baby) recommended this exercise when one is feeling particularly low about ones self.

So I went through my pictures comments, well for 3 minutes, then I got tired, and noted all the things people have called me. :)

It did make me feel good.

Till I went to go find some earlier photos of myself to post here for a motivation, then I again felt like a whale.

*sigh*

but at least I had those few moments of feel goodness. :)

Sigh, oh how hard I worked.

One day...

On Becoming Babywise

I already wrote this whole long post about why I didn't like today.

Then I deleted it.

Because A) it wasn't that exciting

And B) it wasn't very positive.

so alas, it has been deleted. :)

I do want to talk about and ask your opinion on a book, a baby type book called Babywise. I bought it yesterday, and even started it. Here is why I like it.

(first of all, it was only 13.95$, with it being such a popular book in the last 10 years, I am pleased they are not trying to bleed your wallet for 30$ like some of the other books I saw.)

Obviously I have had a lot of friends and family start families, and go through the newborn/baby stages. There are some that from my point of view have a hard time as far as time management, staying sane, keeping a life, getting things done etc. and there are others who were the opposite, they got tons of things done everyday, seemed happy, well rested, and even more, there kids are amazing kids, well behaved and so happy. now that I am expecting my own, I asked the second group of moms how they did it, and they said it was this book, Babywise. Now, let me preface, I am not saying that the first set of moms did things wrong, or were unhappy, I am just saying I lean more towards the second groups way of life.

Now, I started reading this book yesterday, and I haven't gotten into the nitty gritty of how to's yet, so far the first 2 chapters are more about the ways of thinking and what things are important etc, and let me tell you, I was surprised and shocked at what the first chapter said. In a good way. The first group of parents have their babies and then it seems like the next 4 months is a blur and hectic and no stability etc., because their main focus and attention is the new baby. As you think it should be right? According this book, wrong. The main focus in having a new baby, is your marriage. What?! I know, right? I have never heard that before, and reading that chapter, it really made sense. The first chapter is called "Your baby needs a family" in which the author talks about how your baby needs to come into a functioning family, and learn to be a part of a family. Not come into this world thinking the world revolves around them. They need to know that Mom and Dad love each other, and are important to each other, and that they are both there for the baby.

"Great marriages produce great parents"

This was the first line in the chapter that kind of hit me in a way that put it into perspective. Especially when I think about how many couples later down the line say they feel more like roommates, than lovers.

"When there is harmony in the marriage, there is an infused stability with the family"

It is safe to say, that the natural instinct of new parents is to be obsessed with the new baby, and make their world revolve around the baby. But what happens when the second baby comes and you can't do that? That is why I agree and believe when the book says that the baby is coming into an already functioning family, not parents being introduced to an already functioning newborn.

"The goal of parenting is not simply to avoid excessive anxiety, but to create a world of confidence by what we do with each other as much as by what we avoid doing"

I am very aware of what not to do in front of a child, from examples and other things. I know not to argue with Jason in front of them, not to say negative things in front of them etc. I thought as long as I keep myself in check that way, they will not know any of it goes on, if it does. But, the book points out that children notice not only what you DO in front of them like fighting, but what you DON'T do. If you and your husband are not in sync, or worse not in love, or not interacting in a very loving affectionate way, the child does notice. Whether they know what exactly is it, who knows, but they observe the relationships, and the feeling that resides in the home, as early as 4 months old.

I loved this first chapter, and it made me feel so much better, and more at ease about the transition.

The second chapter got more into the feeding. This book is mostly known and praised for its feeding schedule technique. This chapter explained why creating a schedule is ok. The reason why parents who do not like this book, or do not schedule feed is they say their baby has a schedule already, and I feed them when they are hungry. This chapter points out that obviously your baby has some sort of schedule set up, out of randomness, but that the schedule they have is in no way because thats what is best for baby, it is just what is. This chapter talks about why hunger cues are not enough to go off of, and why you shouldn't assume a 2 day old baby knows what is best. There weren't any quotes that stuck out to me in this chapter, and I don't want to offend anyone by going into what this book says is wrong with all the different feeding styles, but lets just say so far, I am on board with babywise. The thing I like the most about this book, is it is not a bullet list must do list of how to parent a baby. It gives you lots of tips, and you pick and choose what you think will work best for you.

For example, a big problem some have with this book is where it advises you to let your baby cry. Well I agree with a lot of others that you should not let your baby just cry until it is at least 3 months old. newborns need to know that you are there for them, and that crying will get your attention, when it is needed. but after a couple months, I think its ok, and important to let your baby cry, when there is no immediate need other than the baby doesn't want to go to sleep yet.

Regardless of how you may feel about the feeding schedule and other literal advice from this book, I think every new parent, and even existing parents should read the first chapter about marriage. I don't think anyone can argue with it.

So anyway, thats my take on Babywise for you. I just refuse to believe that just because you have a new baby means you can't have a life, have your hobbies, go out, get dressed and ready everyday, still get a decent nights rest, clean your house, and function normally. I had a friend who was so exhausted every single day all the way until the baby was like 1 and a half, because she was just at her childs every whim.

I just feel that your baby doesn't guide you, you are there to guide your baby. So I feel like it is ok to teach them routine, and stability. The earlier they learn routine, and feel the comfort of stability, I think the happier the child will be. This book's goal isn't to create selfish parents who just want sleep, it is to create functioning families where all members are happy and joyful with each other.

(**Disclaimer** I do not think any of the type of people mentioned in this post are in anyway bad parents.)