On Becoming Babywise

I already wrote this whole long post about why I didn't like today.

Then I deleted it.

Because A) it wasn't that exciting

And B) it wasn't very positive.

so alas, it has been deleted. :)

I do want to talk about and ask your opinion on a book, a baby type book called Babywise. I bought it yesterday, and even started it. Here is why I like it.

(first of all, it was only 13.95$, with it being such a popular book in the last 10 years, I am pleased they are not trying to bleed your wallet for 30$ like some of the other books I saw.)

Obviously I have had a lot of friends and family start families, and go through the newborn/baby stages. There are some that from my point of view have a hard time as far as time management, staying sane, keeping a life, getting things done etc. and there are others who were the opposite, they got tons of things done everyday, seemed happy, well rested, and even more, there kids are amazing kids, well behaved and so happy. now that I am expecting my own, I asked the second group of moms how they did it, and they said it was this book, Babywise. Now, let me preface, I am not saying that the first set of moms did things wrong, or were unhappy, I am just saying I lean more towards the second groups way of life.

Now, I started reading this book yesterday, and I haven't gotten into the nitty gritty of how to's yet, so far the first 2 chapters are more about the ways of thinking and what things are important etc, and let me tell you, I was surprised and shocked at what the first chapter said. In a good way. The first group of parents have their babies and then it seems like the next 4 months is a blur and hectic and no stability etc., because their main focus and attention is the new baby. As you think it should be right? According this book, wrong. The main focus in having a new baby, is your marriage. What?! I know, right? I have never heard that before, and reading that chapter, it really made sense. The first chapter is called "Your baby needs a family" in which the author talks about how your baby needs to come into a functioning family, and learn to be a part of a family. Not come into this world thinking the world revolves around them. They need to know that Mom and Dad love each other, and are important to each other, and that they are both there for the baby.

"Great marriages produce great parents"

This was the first line in the chapter that kind of hit me in a way that put it into perspective. Especially when I think about how many couples later down the line say they feel more like roommates, than lovers.

"When there is harmony in the marriage, there is an infused stability with the family"

It is safe to say, that the natural instinct of new parents is to be obsessed with the new baby, and make their world revolve around the baby. But what happens when the second baby comes and you can't do that? That is why I agree and believe when the book says that the baby is coming into an already functioning family, not parents being introduced to an already functioning newborn.

"The goal of parenting is not simply to avoid excessive anxiety, but to create a world of confidence by what we do with each other as much as by what we avoid doing"

I am very aware of what not to do in front of a child, from examples and other things. I know not to argue with Jason in front of them, not to say negative things in front of them etc. I thought as long as I keep myself in check that way, they will not know any of it goes on, if it does. But, the book points out that children notice not only what you DO in front of them like fighting, but what you DON'T do. If you and your husband are not in sync, or worse not in love, or not interacting in a very loving affectionate way, the child does notice. Whether they know what exactly is it, who knows, but they observe the relationships, and the feeling that resides in the home, as early as 4 months old.

I loved this first chapter, and it made me feel so much better, and more at ease about the transition.

The second chapter got more into the feeding. This book is mostly known and praised for its feeding schedule technique. This chapter explained why creating a schedule is ok. The reason why parents who do not like this book, or do not schedule feed is they say their baby has a schedule already, and I feed them when they are hungry. This chapter points out that obviously your baby has some sort of schedule set up, out of randomness, but that the schedule they have is in no way because thats what is best for baby, it is just what is. This chapter talks about why hunger cues are not enough to go off of, and why you shouldn't assume a 2 day old baby knows what is best. There weren't any quotes that stuck out to me in this chapter, and I don't want to offend anyone by going into what this book says is wrong with all the different feeding styles, but lets just say so far, I am on board with babywise. The thing I like the most about this book, is it is not a bullet list must do list of how to parent a baby. It gives you lots of tips, and you pick and choose what you think will work best for you.

For example, a big problem some have with this book is where it advises you to let your baby cry. Well I agree with a lot of others that you should not let your baby just cry until it is at least 3 months old. newborns need to know that you are there for them, and that crying will get your attention, when it is needed. but after a couple months, I think its ok, and important to let your baby cry, when there is no immediate need other than the baby doesn't want to go to sleep yet.

Regardless of how you may feel about the feeding schedule and other literal advice from this book, I think every new parent, and even existing parents should read the first chapter about marriage. I don't think anyone can argue with it.

So anyway, thats my take on Babywise for you. I just refuse to believe that just because you have a new baby means you can't have a life, have your hobbies, go out, get dressed and ready everyday, still get a decent nights rest, clean your house, and function normally. I had a friend who was so exhausted every single day all the way until the baby was like 1 and a half, because she was just at her childs every whim.

I just feel that your baby doesn't guide you, you are there to guide your baby. So I feel like it is ok to teach them routine, and stability. The earlier they learn routine, and feel the comfort of stability, I think the happier the child will be. This book's goal isn't to create selfish parents who just want sleep, it is to create functioning families where all members are happy and joyful with each other.

(**Disclaimer** I do not think any of the type of people mentioned in this post are in anyway bad parents.)

let the madness begin.

we all obviously knew it was only a matter of time before I started the nursery.

And I am pleased to report it has begun. :)

Starting with this fabulous 5$ chair I purchased a while ago.

Some fancy fabric and a few staples later....

Lovely right?
I love it.

A couple of things I should mention in case anyone wants to re-do a chair of their own.

1. I chose a fabric with stripes(I didn't have a lot of options), and I tried really hard to make sure they all lined up, but towards the end I got impatient, pulled a little too hard in one corner so now the top panel is slightly crooked.

2. I used a staple gun for this project, because obviously its easier. The top part of the chair pushes out, and is two sided. The staples weren't exactly flush, and poked out a little which I didn't think would matter. But when going to push it back in, it made it somewhat hard. do-able, but nerve wracking.

And yes it is in the nursery, and no the green stripe going down the corner will not be staying. AND, the wall looks red in this pic, but I promise it is burnt orange.
I just hate baby blue. Have I mentioned that?
Actually, all things pastel for that matter.
The hubby and I bought all the fabric I will need for the nursery, so in the next coming weeks instead of my boring prego posts, it will be boring craft/re-do posts.
which are a little more fun right??

Let the fun begin!!

Now that I know our baby is a boy, there is going to be less time for blogging, and more time for getting ready!

Yes, I realize its still months away, but I am not a procrastinator, quite the opposite with how impatient I am.

The nursery will be first. And the first part to that, is cleaning out the room that is now my closet. :( sniff sniff.

Then to paint the nursery, burnt orange. I HATE baby blue, hate it, my little boy will not be adorned in baby blue, nor will his room. baby green is ok, and orange is best.

Then Jason will need to put the furniture together, and the decorating can begin!

Sometime after the nursery is finished, the sewing can begin.

I need to sew the crib set, because there is nothing out there to my liking.

and of course I need one of these...

and the project I am really excited for, a bunch of these....

Everyone keeps talking about getting pee'd on when you have a boy and I refuse to believe that is an unavoidable event. I think there is no reason one should be coated in urine when a simple fabric cone could act as a barrier. So you better believe I will have at least 20 of these.

I know over the last 2 years I have seen TONS of craft type things I knew I would want when I had a baby, but now I can't remember them!!

help me out, point me to all the good craft blogs and projects you found helpful with a baby.

pretty please? :)

on a more serious note, now that I know its a boy, it feels completely different, and a little more stressful as far as being a parent. being pregnant is fine, there is very little responsibility, but now it is sinking in that there is one person inside me, not this shell that will one day be a person, a boy, a little boy that will one day grow into a young man that I am responsible for raising in the right way. I feel a huge weight, a huge responsibility, and I imagine it will only continue to grow. sigh.

Its a.....!!!!!

The ultra sound appointment to determine gender was this morning, in sunny San Francisco. It was so perfect. we woke up, got ready, ate breakfast together and headed over to the place. Can I just say, that if anyone is in the area and wants a 3D u/s, this place was so awesome. It was so warm, inviting, cozy and friendly. So much better than a sterile white Dr's office.

our wee one is a wee little boy!! I am really excited, but Jason is so excited to have a little boy to do boy things with. We just can't wait for him to get here, it seems like everyone is having boys so he will have lots of friends to play with! Little Henry David Powell is doing great, and already so loved and adored.

It is a lot more fun being pregnant and knowing the gender.

sigh.

I feel like a huge mystery has been solved and the world can continue to revolve.

This is the money shot, with baby Powell proudly showing his goods.

Then we got a bunch of 3D shots, which because he is my child I think they are super cute, but I also realize they look super creepy. lol

He kinda looks like a baby panda.

Well little Henry is already super loved, my parents are so excited for him to come since he is their first grandchild, and my sisters are oober excited also.

We already bought him some way stylish outfits along with some sweet nike kicks. :)

So everyone can relax and go about their lives again!

OUR BABY IS A BOY!!!

2 years ago today, I made one of the best decisions on my life.

to marry my best friend.

2 years ago today, at this time, Jason took me by the hand and led me into the sealing room in the salt lake temple where we would be sealed.

Everything after that point went by fast, and was joyful.

(minus those dang florist messing up my flowers. grrr)

1 year and 364 days ago, Jason and I started our married life together, and it has been absolutely perfect every minute.

Jason and I know each other so well, and communicate with each other in harmony.

Jason and I had no idea what life had in store for us on that day.

1 year ago, today, Jason and I celebrated our first anniversary.

Having been married for 1 year, we could tell you at that point, we had never been happier.

the first year is a lot of learning and growing, and Jason and I learned to grow together.

Sitting at the top of a ferris wheel in San Diego, we also had no idea what the next year would bring.

Here we are, 2 wonderful years later, and I can tell you that we truly have never been happier.

Our 2nd year of marriage brought:

Our favorite Ward, Sugarhouse ward

lots of house hunting

buying our first home!

decorating our first home.

adopting our first kitten.

adopting our second kitten.

dinner parties.

family parties.

being healthier than we have ever been.

lots of new recipes.

dream jobs.

paying off our first car.

and of course, the news of our first child.

We were married at 10:20 am, October 18, 2008.

at 10:20 am, October 18, 2010, we are finding out the gender of our first child.

I really can't think of a more perfect time.

Sitting here, 2 years later, we can tell you that we have no idea what the next year as in store, but can not wait for it to begin.

cant wait for the holidays

I am really, really sorry that I am so excited for the holidays.

I know, I know, that Halloween and Thanksgiving should get their moments of glory and celebration, but I just can not wait for Christmas.

I am excited for Halloween, because Halloween is the start of the holiday season.

I even really like Thanksgiving because its a family time, no gifts, no obligations, just family and food.

This year my little sister, Hollie, is doing a study abroad in Austria, and she won't be home for Thanksgiving, but she WILL be home for Christmas.

I get so excited to think about:

Hanging lights on my own house

Putting our christmas tree in the front window

training our cats to leave the tree alone

wrapping gifts

hanging stockings

turning on the heater

buying winter coats

cuddling in a warm house watching snow fall

singing Christmas hymns in church

starting our own family traditions

Hollie being home

Remember back from here, when I made mine and Jason's stockings, which I still looove. Well this year I need to make 3 more! Yes, I am going to make one for each of our cats. lol. They really are part of the family. Of course I can't make the babys yet until I find out the gender. Well I can probably make it, just not put a name on it.

but I will try and give each Holiday its time.

So for Halloween I am excited for:

Pumpkins!!

deciding what our costumes will be

fall leaves

scarecrow decorations

mounds and mounds of candy at the store

carmel apples

candy corn

wondering what time trick or treaters will start coming

a night of hanging out with family

and for Thanksgiving I am excited for:

food!

planning the menu with my mom

cooking my assigned food all morning

the smells

the family time

the stuffing

the gravy

the laziness of the day

the shopping the next day

the parade

the feeling of gratitude everywhere

starting to play Christmas music

So you see, I love all holidays, but Christmas is just the king of holidays.

so I am excited for the king.

Whats a girl to do?

Too many clothes.

Does anyone else have this problem? I don't really think its that I have too many clothes, its that I have so many different sizes of clothes. I have my more overweight from 2 years ago clothes, all the way down to my smaller sizes from 6 months ago, then even back up to maternity sizes. So I feel like I have a million options for what to wear, but then realize that over half of my clothes don't fit in some way or another, or if they do, they don't look good due to the ever growing belly.

I am definitely one of those people that keep clothes thinking "one day" I will wear them again, whether its during pregnancy, post pregnancy or pre pregnancy.

The issue that created this MAY be that I do not just have a closet. I have a room, full of my clothes and shoes. we are in a 4 bedroom house, and Jason and I only take up 1 room. So one room will be his office, one room is where all my crafts or decor-in-waiting stays, and the last room is my closet. So I never have this nagging feeling in the back of my mind not to buy something for fear it won't fit in my closet, because of course it will. So one of these days, I need to go through said closet.

I will most likely stop working in my third trimester, and that is also most likely when my giant to-do list will be completed, or started for that matter.

I realize this is not the worst problem a girl could have, but you see, this room size closet that I speak of, is where the baby that I constantly speak of will live. So this room needs to be organized and somehow made to fit in the closet in the office. It can no longer occupy a room, for it must fit in a regular sized closet. I am so picked on. :)

I am posting a lot lately. deal with it. :)

Sooo, I have heard of pregnant women "popping overnight", I just never thought I would be one of them. And its not like it matters, I just never thought of it.

Despite what you might think or see, the past 3 weeks I have been getting chubby, and bloated. But usually with a little exercise, or certain clothes, I have been able to hide it, or make it(bloatedness, not baby) go away.

Today was the first day, it never went away, there wasnt a shirt on earth that could hide it, and was apparent in any mirror I saw.

Today was also the the first day, I put on one of my regular items of clothing and it did not fit!! :(

Its my favorite little fitted jacket, so I really hope I can whip myself back into shape after this baby pops out.

I am here to tell you, pregnancy is absolutely boring, and unfun until you find out the gender. sure, there is the initial excitement of "we're going to have a baby!" but that wears off after a week or two.

Then you just have symptoms.

You can't buy baby clothes.

you can't pick names.

you can't decorate the nursery.

you can't plan showers.

and until you REALLY pop, you can't buy maternity clothes.

You can:

buy saltines and ginger ale.

realize you need to clean the toilet better.

think about how unprepared you and your house are.

worry about how you will raise them.

stress about the pains of childbirth.

listen over and over to people tell you, the baby will be here in no time.

:)

So basically, I am glad I am well into my second trimester, and the fun can FINALLY begin.

We find out the gender in 10 days. seriously. 10. its going to be so unreal.

So stay tuned.

the worst and best week ever.

This week/weekend has been the longest I can remember.

Jason woke up with kidney stones on Friday morning, and the pains did not go away until Wednesday.

Tuesday night at 12:32 am, Jason woke me to ask to go to the ER.

I of course took him.

an hour before, I took some sleeping pills, since I have trouble sleeping with pregnancy.

So the whole time I was so so so tired.

I know obviously, poor Jason has it worse, but it just ended the ordeal with a dramatic realization of how bad the last 5 days had been.

I, as I am sure he, was emotionally, physically drained.

At one point at the ER, somewhere around 2:15 am, I just broke down in tears with the stress, and heartache that I had been feeling for my husband the whole week.

to top it off, I saw a Physical Therapist on Monday, who confirmed that I had a herniated disc, and an injured SI joint, causing extreme pain in my lower back. This all from the car accident. to top off that, there is absolutely nothing anyone can or will do, until I have the baby. No MRI's, no XRays, meaning no treatment or cure, other than weekly physical therapy.

oh this week has been horrid.

BUT.

at 3:17 am Wednesday morning, after Jason and I had arrived home from the ER, I wanted nothing more than to fall asleep in my bed, with my husband. It wasn't that I was so tired and I wanted to sleep, or even that my body was already shutting down on the way up the stairs, but I wanted to retreat, relax, and rest with my husband. I wanted to be with him, and just be near him. I know this seems weird that I would put so much focus on that so obvious desire, of course people want to go to sleep with their spouse, but it just put the whole week into perspective. It didn't matter how bad the week was, it didn't matter how much sleep I lost, it just mattered that I was with Jason.

Wednesday, after a final dose of medication, Jason felt better. I went to work like I had been doing all week, and expected him to rest, maybe work from home, and sleep.

I came home, and just say by him until he was ready to leave to eat dinner. I usually go change, get a drink, but I didn't for some reason.

We left, ate dinner, wound down, and drove home.

Even when we got home I went straight to the couch ready to watch survivor.

around 7 pm I finally went upstairs where I realized, my sweet husband had cleaned the whole house, and had done the laundry.

oh, I could not have been more excited, or felt more loved.

Jason knows how much I love a clean house, how happy I feel, and also how hards its been for me to keep up with it, and work, and be pregnant.

he also revealed his secret plan to install a ceiling fan in our downstairs living room, that gets really hot.

My husband is truly wonderful.

They were sincere, thoughtful and much needed tokens of love, that costs little to nothing.

This week for me, just solidified (not that I needed it) how much I adore, love, admire and need Jason.

I am not sure I deserve him, but so grateful I have him.

Thank you, Jason, for making this the best worst week ever.

pregnancy, equippeed with question.

so I decided all further pregnancy pics should be done in fitted shirts.

the last one, was done in an empire waisted shirt and it did not give the exact accuracy of my baby bump.

allow me to explain to you this photo, besides the obvious.

A) I have not eaten and gorged myself yet today with delicious food, therefor there is no bloatedness that there will be at 6 pm tonight.

B) My baby is confused, instead of putting all the junk in the tummy, our wee one has decided to place junk in white girl booty, and my chest. when I lost 50 lbs, I lost my chest, or at least the plumpness of them, and this pregnancy, it all came back! and I used to have a tiny booty, now its twice the size.

C) I DO have a baby bump, but today I decided to stop wearing my belt, because I no longer need it, and when the belt is not there tightening my pants, the bump is less obvious. but trust me, if I wore my belt, my bump would be muffin topping over my pants.

QUESTION: I have heard that your hair grows like crazy when you are pregnant. for this reason I have decided this is the time to grow out my bangs. But they dont seem to be growing any faster. Is this a myth?

P.S. only 14 days until we find out the gender. eeeeks.